Thinking about my life...

What makes each of us special? I am thinking about it...is it a talent? or maybe a feature? The pursuit of education? I'm not sure.

How does my existence change anyone else's. Am I making a difference?

Or, am I afraid of what someone might see? Afraid to put my life out there to be examined, to be completely transparent. Is that really a good enough reason to hide? Or, would it really be considered hiding?

I read the blogs of friends and family, never putting down my thoughts. A voyeur in life. Being an observer in everyone's life, but not really involved. Not really connecting. Being able to say..."yes, I know (such and such) they were a good person" when really I am thinking, that person made my life hell. I disliked being in their presence. But does that make it right to say they were a good person, or should I say how I really felt. And, now that it is almost 20 years later, does it really matter?

What makes right...right? Isn't it a duty to do all that I can to make the world better than when I came?

Forgive me. I am just connecting with a lot of people lately and I keep thinking I should have done more. More to stay in touch, more to be a better friend, just more.